Mourning

I attended a funeral today for the husband of one of my coworkers, MaryAnn Smith. MaryAnn was such a great person to talk to about what was going on with my dad. Her husband had a fatal illness that slowly took him out over a period of two years. He was in a coma for the last little bit. They had chosen hospice care since his disease was incurable. MaryAnn was a great source of strength for me when I struggled with how to feel about Dad's situation. She was relieved when her husband finally passed away since he had suffered so much. She also missed him, of course. While sitting at the funeral, I found myself very overcome with emotion as I listened to their children talk about their dad. He was only a year older than my dad and I found myself jealous of that family because they got to have a funeral. We all knew that a church funeral didn't really make sense for my dad and he had a thing against funerals because of traumatic family funerals had been for him. I still wished I could have given a talk on his life, what I learned from him, the funny stories, and my testimony of the gospel and how we can be a family forever. I'm hoping that I can have a meaningful experience when we get together to spread Dad's ashes. If anyone has an idea on when this might happen, please let me know. My schedule seems to book up fast.