Believe it or not, I am a person of great faith and I believe we have a Heavenly Father who gives us gifts, talents, life, and even challenges. This is not meant to be preachy, just an attempt to share my feelings.
When Emerson lost his job at Heritage, it seemed like the end of the world. We had never imagined this happening. When I had my accident at the end of October, I realized the blessing it was to have him there to take care of me. It just wouldn't have been possible if he had a full time job. The situation also helped me to not be complacent or comfortable at work since you never know what tomorrow brings. I'm also grateful to be able to walk again and won't ever take it for granted.
Another blessing in my life has been my willingness to learn and the strange creativity God has given me. I say "strange" because I can't draw or paint like Dad, Sharon, or Kathy and I can't sing like Dexter or dance like Rick, and I certainly can't cook. Despite that, I'm always wanting to learn how to do new things. I can't always come up with ideas on my own, but I'm pretty good at taking one or more ideas from other people and adapting them to what I'm looking for. This is how my "design" career was born. Everyone at work seems to need a poster for this, a flyer for that, a card, an invitation....I got pretty good at pulling things together and eventually learned to use PhotoShop well enough to do some pretty fun things. The picture with this post is a Photoshop doodle I did. All of this has made me very valuable at work and even my family finds it handy.
This will sound weird, but I feel it is a great blessing to not have wealth. I appreciate the struggle to prioritize and how our family has to unite to make our way in the world. Earning your way and having to work hard for it makes it all the better. Despite the challenge, we are still able to be generous at times and it means a lot to sacrifice for a good cause. Many people have been there for us to help with church clothes, travel expenses, school costs, proms, etc. and we want to help where we can.
The turmoil of my childhood and my bipolar disorder are definite blessings. I have been able to help so many people with their own problems or their child's problems because of my experience. As I work with the youth at Heritage during the play each year, I see several who are just like I was in high school. I can't erase their problems, but I can ease the pain a bit and point them in the right direction. My bipolar has helped me to have my creativity and to accomplish a lot of things at a frenzied pace. I am also blessed to have received treatment for it so I can manage it fairly well. My friends and family help me to stay on top of it so it doesn't become a curse.
The biggest blessings in my life are my friends and family. One of the best things about marrying into a Navajo family is the extended definition of family. There is no other world where I feel more comfortable or feel like I belong than when with my Native American family. Nothing against Emerson, but I feel like I was meant to marry into his family rather than just marry him. "In law" is not derogatory in our world. They've been there for me in every crisis to pick up the pieces. I have friends who are definitely my sisters on this earth. Tami is my chaplain and my sister in klutziness. Angela is my powwow sister and we get together to eat chocolate and laugh about our Navajo hubbies. Leslie is my practical spiritual sister and fellow Oregonian.
Faith is the one blessing I couldn't live without. There has to be a purpose to life. I am so grateful to have a Savior who atoned for my sins and knows how I feel. When the rest of the world shuts me out, I know that He will listen. With many of my struggles over the years, it is that faith that helped me to feel His guidance on what to do. No big visions or miracles, just that impression in the back of your mind that won't be quieted. I think I would have abandoned ship years ago if not for His urging me to stay.
Other blessings include getting to talk to each of my parents before they passed away, getting to know my sister-in-law Tina's parents, having dogs who love me, gardening, learning to tat, finding long lost friends online, dancing at powwows, and having a home, and transportation, and a job. Being a mom and getting to pass on to them my knowledge, my love for the arts, and, apparently, my general geekiness is pretty great too. I've wandered off track here and there, but all is not lost. I will just keep on doing my best and taking note of the blessings along the way, even when they are dressed as hardships.
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